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| "Johnny Betts is a rude 'abnoxious' jerk who needs to be 'punced' in the face."- A grammatically-challenged non-fan |
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MOVIE HORROR STORIESby Anon E. Mouse Jr. I work at Blockbuster, and about two weeks ago, a coworker and I had what I have dubbed a "Close Encounter of the Stupid Kind" with an old woman who was buying The Passion of the Christ. I don't remember now if it was for her or for her daughter. But the main details are something I will never forget. (At least, not for a very long time.) It was later on that day that I defined a "Close Encounter of the Stupid Kind" as "Meeting a person who has no idea about a major plot detail of a movie, especially one which can be found in the description." Plot details such as "The ship sinks in Titanic," "Jaws features a killer shark," "Pirates of the Caribbean is about a group of pirates in the Caribbean," and "Alien has an alien in it." (You may want to add this to the Movie Mark Dictionary. Or not. It's up to you.) In this case, the major plot detail is "Jesus dies in The Passion of the Christ." Who DOESN'T know that detail, especially if they read the back of the box? But that poor woman had no idea, and broke down crying right in front of us when she found out. My fellow employees and I (plus at least one customer who was in line behind her) were all stunned. After she paid for the movie and left... well, my coworker (the one who'd shared that detail) kept talking about it for the rest of the day. According to our manager, he was still talking about it last week. I can't say I blame him. Johnny: Broke down crying? Because Jesus dies in the movie? Or out of sheer embarrassment for not being able to decipher the plot after reading the description on the back of the DVD case? Yeah. That's a little odd. Moral of the Story: How do we make up a moral for this one? Um, learn how to better understand plot descriptions so you don't embarrass yourself in front of others? Maybe I should teach a class. "How to Understand a Movie's Plot Just by Reading the Plot Summary 101 - Professor Johnny Betts." Send your stories to me and let the whole world know just how dangerous going to the movies can be. |
HOME PAGE  Eagle Eye Righteous Kill Tropic Thunder Traitor Death Race Star Wars: Clone Wars The Dark Knight Journey to the Center of the Earth Hancock  Weekend Results: 1. Beverly Hills Chihuahua($29,300,465) 2. Eagle Eye($17,709,817) 3. Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist($11,311,751) 4. Nights in Rodanthe($7,368,259) 5. Appaloosa($5,050,310) |
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Copyright © 2004 The Movie Mark. All Rights Reserved. No reproduction of these reviews or any of the original material on this site is allowed without prior permission from Johnny Betts. Comply or suffer the consequences of Johnny's size 11 biker boot. Wanna be a Movie Mark? Send Johnny Betts an email (johnny_betts@hotmail.com) to be added to the list or complete: The Movie Mark Questionnaire.
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