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| "Johnny Betts is a rude 'abnoxious' jerk who needs to be 'punced' in the face."- A grammatically-challenged non-fan |
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MOVIE HORROR STORIESby Lavanya My friend lives in India, and he was watching a screening of LOTR (Return of the King), and this couple walks into the theatre late. The guy obviously hadn't seen the first two movies and didn't know the story, so the chick decided that she would explain to him the whole story right then and there. Despite the glares and well, thrown popcorn, they just kept talking until the intermission. For those of you who don't know, in India, at a crucial part of the story, the movie pauses and everyone gets a 15-minute break to use the toilet and whatever else. So during this break, the dude and his girlfriend left the theatre and my friend realized that he had some chewing gum in his pocket. So he whipped out the gum, chewed on it for a bit, and then stuck it to the seat of the guy's chair. The guy sauntered back and gave everyone one of those "I dare you to try and do something about me" looks and proceeded to sit down, while my friend just went into fits of laughter. After about 20 minutes, the guy gets an "oh crap!" look on his face and feels up his bum and then turns to his girlfriend and says, "I've got chewing gum on my butt." He then glares at everyone and they left the theatre and didn't come back. Johnny: Thanks, Lavanya, for the inside look at the movie-going experience in India. Your friend did a good job of taking care of the problem with the resources he had available. My size 11 biker boots placed in the same location also do a good job. Moral of the Story: Going to the movies? Then shut your mouth or somebody might shut it (or at least another orifice) for you. Send your stories to me and let the whole world know just how dangerous going to the movies can be. |
HOME PAGE  Journey to the Center of the Earth Hancock Get Smart The Incredible Hulk The Strangers Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull Young at Heart Iron Man Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed  Weekend Results: 1. The Dark Knight($158,411,483) 2. Mamma Mia!($27,751,240) 3. Hancock($14,040,178) 4. Journey to the Center of the Earth($12,340,435) 5. Hellboy 2($10,117,815) |
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