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Movie Minutiae - New Line Cinema Preview - Fall/Winter 2006

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Below is a list of upcoming releases through December for New Line Cinema. The synopses come straight from the studio - you know I'd never use such flowery language to describe these films. My expectations and insights are included. Release dates are subject to change. My opinions are subject to be highly accurate.

TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE: THE BEGINNING - October 6

TCM 2 Synopsis: The origins of the legendary horror character Leatherface will finally be revealed in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. The film, which is set years before the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie, stars Jordana Brewster and is being directed by Jonathan Liebesman.

Johnny's Take: Jonathan Liebesman??? The same man who directed the intensely mediocre Darkness Falls??? BOOYA! I say freakin' BOOYA! Yeah, not really. If Jessica Biel and her tight jeans were in this movie then I'd be very excited, but as it stands I can only attest to possessing an interest level that is slightly above indifferent.

This actually could be fairly decent, but it could just as easily be craptastic, so we'll have to wait and see. The trailer provides promise, but I've been misled by many a deceptive trailer. Ah trailers, much like women - always promising one thing and then delivering another.

Um, since I'm pretty sure the majority of my readers are female then I should probably go ahead and apologize for that grossly inaccurate and highly ill-advised attempt at a joke. Sorry 'bout that one, ladies.

texaschainsawmovie.com

LITTLE CHILDREN - October 6

Little Children Synopsis: Kate Winslet, Patrick Wilson and Jennifer Connelly star in LITTLE CHILDREN, the latest work from Oscar-nominated Writer/Director Todd Field. Based on the novel by Tom Perrotta, LITTLE CHILDREN centers on a handful of individuals whose lives intersect on the playgrounds, town pools and streets of their small community in surprising and potentially dangerous ways.

Johnny's Take: Who in the world is naming these movies? When I saw the title for this one I immediately assumed it was a stupid kid's movie. But the trailer proves that's nowhere near the case. Looks like a dark, mysteriously trailer. I'm intrigued! Plus, Kate Winslet and Jennifer Connelly? Oh yeah.

Oh, and somebody might want to let Michael Jackson know the real premise of this movie before he purchases his ticket.

littlechildrenmovie.com

TENACIOUS D IN: THE PICK OF DESTINY - November 17

Tenacious D Synopsis: Actors/musicians Jack Black and Kyle Gass bring their infamous rock duo Tenacious D to the big screen in the comedy Tenacious D in: The Pick Of Destiny. The film tells the story of how “The D” became the self-proclaimed greatest band on earth and is being directed by Liam Lynch.

Johnny's Take: Look, I like Jack Black and all, but the trailer is just weird. I honestly don't know what to expect. I'm calling "hit and miss" on this one and will reserve further judgment until I can absorb everything in its full context.

tenaciousdmovie.com

THE NATIVITY STORY - December 1

nativitystory Synopsis: The Nativity Story chronicles the arduous journey of two people, Mary and Joseph, a miraculous pregnancy, and the history-defining birth of Jesus. This dramatic and compelling story comes to life in a major motion picture starring Keisha Castle-Hughes (Whale Rider) as Mary, Oscar Isaac (Guerrilla) as Joseph, and Academy Award® nominee Shoreh Aghdashloo (House of Sand and Fog) as Elizabeth, the mother of John the Baptist. The Nativity Story is directed by Catherine Hardwicke (Thirteen, Lords of Dogtown) from a screenplay by Mike Rich (The Rookie, Finding Forrester).

Johnny's Take: I like how the synopsis presents the plot to us as if we've never heard the story. "Did you hear the story about Jesus? Man, let me tell you, there were these two people - Mary and Joseph I think were their names - and this miraculous pregnancy dealio ... and I think some wise men and mangers were involved..."

It actually sounds like an interesting take on the Jesus story. We've had approximately 3872 Jesus movies, so one focusing on the events prior to His birth might give us a refreshing look.

The trailer is just a teaser and doesn't tell us anything other than there will be lots of soaring, inspirational music.

thenativitystory.com
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Ghouls

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Righteous Kill

Tropic Thunder

Traitor

Death Race

Star Wars: Clone Wars

The Dark Knight

Journey to the Center of the Earth

Hancock

Weekend Results:

1. Beverly Hills Chihuahua($29,300,465)

2. Eagle Eye($17,709,817)

3. Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist($11,311,751)

4. Nights in Rodanthe($7,368,259)

5. Appaloosa($5,050,310)
 
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