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Movie Review - Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007)
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(What this rating means)
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| Director: |
Tim Story |
| Starring: |
Ioan Gruffudd, Jessica Alba, Chris Evans, Michael Chiklis, and Julian McMahon |
| Rated: |
PG |
| Length: |
minutes |
| Genre: |
Action/Comic Book |
| Tagline: |
Rise |
| Studio: |
20th Century Fox |
| Website: |
Fantastic Four 2 |
| Release: |
June 15, 2007 |
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PLOT
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Under the threat of destruction of his own family and planet, The Silver Surfer (the herald for Galactus - the devourer of worlds)
journeys to Earth to prepare it for Galactus' consumption. Of course, it's up to the Fantastic Four to stop him. Throw in the
return of Dr. Doom, and it's party time! If you're six years old. A mediocre sequel to the mediocre predecessor ensues.
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JOHNNY'S TAKE
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Sigh. I give up. This is a film franchise that had two years to improve upon its critically-reviled first attempt
(feel free to read my excellent review of that one), and what do they do? Repeat all the same mistakes.
Reed Richards, despite one quick flash of a semblance of leadership, still has the personality of a marshmallow, Jessica Alba (looking
a little too similar to Mariah Carey) is reading her cue cards with even less emotion, and The Thing's foam rubber costume can still be
purchased at Wal-Mart for $29.95. What's worse is The Thing has been turned into a bigger source of comic relief. I wanted a rage-fueled,
indestructible force, and instead we get Fozzy the Bear. How cute.
While there are a handful of funny moments, most of the humor is directed squarely at pre-teens. To emphasize my point, let me draw attention
to two specific instances that illustrate exactly where this franchise stands:
- During Reed Richards' bachelor party, The Thing dances a little jig, drinks a pitcher of beer, and then belches with such force that it
blows some guy's hair back. Yeah. That's what I want to see from a huge rock/human hybrid who is supposed to be powered by his anger.
Sure.
- At the same party, Reed Richards dances with a couple of girls and uses his elasticity to twirl them around from great distances and to
swirl around in the air and impress everybody with his mad dancing skills. I wish I were kidding.
The film isn't helped by the fact that the first 30-45 minutes lumber along with no action sequences other than the chase scene between Johnny
Storm and the Silver Surfer that we all saw in the film's original teaser trailer. So buckle up and prepare to sit through a bunch of
Richards/Sue Storm wedding blues.
Oh, and Dr. Doom? Still not menacing nor intimidating. I just don't think Julian McMahon has the ability to pull off evil. Sure, he's a
smug little jerk, but this is DOCTOR DOOM we're talking about! Not Dr. Von Douchebag. And don't even get me started on how big of a ball
was dropped in regard to Galactus.
The best thing I can say about Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer is that I was slightly entertained in an I'm-not-expecting-much
kind of way. Sure, it's cute, it's fun for the family, and it's fairly harmless, but is that what you want in comic book movie? Not me. I want
dark! I want edge! Neither quality is to be found here. Well, except for the dark I saw when my eyelids started getting heavy and I
was literally struggling to stay awake.
Now I know I'm older, so naturally the goofy, child-oriented humor isn't going to sit as comfortably with me. So I asked my 12-year-old brother
what he thought. "It was OK," he responded. "What did you like better, this or Spider-Man 3?" I inquired. "Spider-Man 3. The
Fantastic Four movies just don't have enough action, and this one seemed more for kids than the first one." A 12-year-old thought this was
too childish, folks. I think you have been properly warned.
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ODDS & ENDS
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- With the origin story firmly established, FANTASTIC FOUR: RISE OF THE SILVER SURFER screenwriter Don Payne, a lifelong fan of the Fantastic
Four comics, set out to take the next step with the series. "I wanted this movie to be the rare sequel that's better than the original -- with
more excitement, more drama, more humor, more action," Payne says.
- Hmm. Thanks, Mr. Payne. You've given us a fine example that "wanting" and "making happen" are nowhere near the same thing.
- "The movie draws from the first appearance of the Silver Surfer in Fantastic Four #48-50," says Payne. "But we're also using story elements
from Fantastic Four #57-60, where the Silver Surfer encounters Dr. Doom. There are a couple of moments inspired by the recent Ultimate Extinction
series as well."
- Laurence Fishburne provides the voice of the Silver Surfer.
- Jessica Alba was in Into the Blue with Josh Brolin who was in Hollow Man with Kevin Bacon.
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MAMA'S APPROVAL
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Language consists of one or two d**ns and an a** or two. Pretty safe stuff.
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TRAILER COMPARISON
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The trailer consists of the majority of the film's high points. The movie offers little beyond that.
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THE GIST
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I would certainly advise against you paying to see this on the big screen, unless your young kids force you to go see it. Honestly,
it's not painful to sit through, but it's not gonna blow you away. Is it better than the original? Maybe a little, but certainly not
substantially.
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