"Johnny Betts is a rude 'abnoxious' jerk who needs to be 'punced' in the face."- A grammatically-challenged non-fan  
Movie Review - The Greatest Game Ever Played (2005)  

ratings
 
(What this rating means)  
   
Director: Bill Paxton
Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Stephen Dillane, Peyton List, and Josh Flitter
Rated: PG (for some brief mild language)
Length: 120 minutes
Genre: Sports Drama
Tagline: None.
Studio: Disney
Website: The Greatest Game Ever Played
Release: September 30, 2005

PLOT

The Greatest Game Ever Played is based on the true story of the 1913 U.S. Open, where 20-year-old Francis Ouimet (LaBeouf), an amateur golfer from a working class family, beat the odds to go toe-to-toe with his idol, English legend Harry Vardon (Stephen "I am not Kevin Spacey" Dillane) in what many people feel is the ... wait for it ... greatest golf game every played. A golf drama ensues.

JOHNNY'S TAKE

Johnny Betts Let me go ahead and clear this up - no, The Greatest Game Ever Played is not about the time I led my softball team to victory by knocking in the winning run with a triple. Instead, it's about golf. More specifically, it's based on the book that's based on the true story of Frances Ouimet.

The story is so simple that even a Tennessee Vols fan can follow it - boy loves golf, boy becomes caddy, boy begins to play golf, dad isn't happy because he thinks it's a waste of time, boy miraculously overcomes insanely enormous odds, movie gives audience a bunch of warm and fuzzy feelings, the end. I'll leave it to you to guess the outcome and whether the boy's father eventually accepts his son following his dream.

Stage Diving This is one of those movies that will absolutely thrill its target audience. If you love golf or Disney-produced underdog movies then you'll enjoy this one. For me, it's one of those movies that's good for one viewing. I enjoyed it, but it was a little slow-paced at times, and since I already knew the outcome of the match I wasn't completely enthralled with the tension that Bill Paxton tries to derive by following a golf ball on its arduous journey to the hole. However, others in the audience would clap wildly at every long putt that was sunk.

I have to point out that I didn't find the fat little 10-year-old caddy as cute as most everybody else in the audience. He had some funny moments, but his little one-liners grated my nerves: "easy peasey, lemon squeezey;" "okey dokey, pipe n' smokey;" "read it, roll it, and hole it." Sure, the audience guffawed with overdone laughter, but it just seemed to me that this was an attempt to create some new catchphrases for people all over the world to start using on golf courses. I pray that doesn't happen. I much prefer Stephanie's catchphrase which is addressed to whoever thought these lines were cute enough to put into the movie: shovey wovey up your butty. Hey, I never said I'm all that mature.

ODDS & ENDS

    Watch the hands!
  • Based on the novel by Mark Frost.


  • Shia LaBeouf had never played golf prior to this role. At least that's what multiple people have told me.


  • Did they really play golf in the pouring rain back then? That's strange because now the slightest sprinkle will send people scurrying to the clubhouse for fear the precious greens may be slightly damaged.


  • My sister thought one part was hilarious because she thought somebody referred to Ouimet's caddy as a "pig man." Actually, he referred to him as a "pygmy."


  • Shia LaBeouf was in I, Robot with James Cromwell who was in an episode of The Young Riders with Josh Brolin who was in Hollow Man with Kevin Bacon.
MAMA'S APPROVAL

If this movie materialized and became a human being then you could feel completely comfortable taking it home to meet mama.

TRAILER COMPARISON

The trailer promised a golf drama; the movie delivered a golf drama. I guess you can say: mission accomplished.

THE GIST

Do you like golf and/or underdog sports dramas? If yes, then go see The Greatest Game Ever Played. If no, then find another option. You have absolutely no reason to cry "false marketing!" on this one.

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