"Johnny Betts is a rude 'abnoxious' jerk who needs to be 'punced' in the face."- A grammatically-challenged non-fan  

MOVIE REVIEWS

Are you tired of the same old reviews by the same old critics who you never seem to agree with? Do you get tired of having to keep a thesaurus by your side just to figure out what the critics are saying? If so, then you're in the right place.

Be sure to also read the following special sections:

Johnny's Bad Movie Reviews
Ms. Cali's Classic Movie Reviews

Note: All scores are based on a 5 "mark" scale. An explanation of this highly unique rating system can be found RIGHT HERE!

AUTHOR ABBREVIATIONS

JB = Johnny Betts
SH = Stephanie Hanus
MS = Mr. Shade
MC = Ms. Cali
MA = Ms. Ang

Email the reviewers: Johnny Betts, Mr. Shade, Ms. Ang.

Title Rating Genre Author Score
13 Going On 30 PG-13 Romantic Comedy MC/JB 3
1408 PG-13 Horror/Thriller JB 3.75
16 Blocks PG-13 Drama/Thriller JB 3.75
28 Weeks Later R Horror/Thriller JB 4
3:10 to Yuma R Western JB 5
300 R Action/Adventure/War/Drama JB 4.5
40 Year-Old Virgin R Comedy JB 3.5
50 First Dates PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3.5
Across the Universe PG-13 Musical Nikki 3.5
Aeon Flux PG-13 Action/Sci-Fi JB 2.5
After the Sunset PG-13 Comedy/Crime JB 2.5
Akeelah and the Bee PG Comedic Drama JB 3.75
The Alamo PG-13 Historical Drama MC/JB 3
Alexander R Epic/War JB 1
Alien Express NR Bad Movie/Sci Fi JB 1
Alien Vs. Predator PG-13 Horror/Sci-Fi JB 2.5
Alone in the Dark R Horror/Bad Movie JB 1.5
Amazing Grace PG Historical Drama JB 3.5
American Dreamz PG-13 Comedy JB 1
American Gangster R Crime/Drama JB 4
The Amityville Horror R Horror JB 3.5
Anacondas PG-13 Adventure/Horror JB 2
Anchorman PG-13 Comedy MS 3
The Ant Bully PG Animation/Family JB 2
Assault on Precinct 13 R Action JB 3.5
August Rush PG Drama/Music JB 3.75
Bad News Bears PG-13 Comedy/Sports JB 2
Balls of Fury PG-13 Comedy JB 2.5
The Bank Job R Drama/Thriller JB 3
Basilisk: The Serpent King NR Horror/Bad Movie JB 1.5
Batman Begins PG-13 Action/Comic JB 5
Be Cool PG-13 Crime/Comedy MA 3.75
The Beast of Bray Road R Horror/Bad Movie JB 2
Because I Said So PG-13 Romantic Dramedy JB 2
Beowulf PG-13 Animation/Adventure/Fantasy JB 3.5
Bewitched PG-13 Comedy/Fantasy JB 3.25
The Big Bounce PG-13 Comedy JB 3
Black Snake Moan R Drama JB 3
Blade: Trinity R Action/Comic Book JB 3
Blades of Glory PG-13 Comedy JB 3.25
Blonde and Blonder PG-13 Bad Movie JB 1
Blood Diamond R Action/Drama JB 3.5
Boogeyman PG-13 Horror JB 2.5
The Bourne Supremacy PG-13 Action/Thriller JB 3.5
The Bourne Ultimatum PG-13 Action/Thriller JB 3.75
The Brave One R Drama/Crime/Thriller JB 3.5
Breach PG-13 Drama/Thriller JB 3.5
The Break-Up PG-13 Romantic Dramedy JB 3.5
Broken Trail NR Western JB 4
The Brothers Grimm PG-13 Adventure/Comedy/Fairy Tale JB 3.5
The Bucket List PG-13 Drama/Comedy/Dramedy JB 3
The Butterfly Effect R Thriller JB 4
Cars G Animation/Family/Comedy JB 4.25
Casanova R Drama/Romance/Comedy JB 2.5
Casino Royale PG-13 Action/Adventure/Thriller JB 3.75
Catwoman PG-13 Action/Comic Book JB 1.5
The Cave PG-13 Monster/Action JB 3
Cellular PG-13 Action/Adventure JB 3
Centipede! PG-13 Bad Movie/Horror/Sci-Fi JB 1.5
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory PG Family/Fantasy JB 3
Chasing Liberty PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 2.5
Chicken Little G Animation/Family JB 2.5
The Chronicles of Riddick PG-13 Sci-Fi/Action JB 4
The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe PG Adventure/Fantasy JB 5
Cinderella Man PG-13 Drama JB 5
Click PG-13 Comedy/Drama/Fantasy JB 3.25
Closer R Drama/Romance SH 2
Coach Carter PG-13 Sports Drama JB 3.75
Code Name: The Cleaner PG-13 Unfunny Comedy JB 1
Collateral R Action/Thriller JB 3.5
The Condemned R Action JB 2.5
Constantine R Action/Comic Bool JB 3.25
The Constant Gardener R Drama/Romance JB 3
Crank R Action/Thriller/Comedy JB 2.75
Crash R Drama JB 4.25
Cry_Wolf PG-13 Mystery/Suspense JB 3.75
Cursed PG-13 Horror/Comedy JB 2
The Dangerous R Bad Movie JB 1
Dark Storm NR Sci Fi Original/Bad Movie JB 1.5
Date Movie PG-13 Comedy/Parody JB 1
Dawn of the Dead R Horror JB 3.5
The Day After Tomorrow PG-13 Action/Disaster Flick JB 2
Day of the Dead (DVD) R Horror/Thriller JB 2.5
Dead Weekend R Bad Movie JB 0
The Debt R Bad Movie JB 1
Déjà Vu PG-13 Action/Sci-Fi/Thriller JB 3.75
The Departed R Crime/Drama/Thriller JB 4.5
The Descent R Horror/Thriller JB 3.25
The Devil Wears Prada PG-13 Comedy/Drama MC 3.5
Disturbia PG-13 Thriller JB 3.5
Dodgeball PG-13 Comedy JB 4
Domino R Action/Drama JB 2.5
Dragonfight R Bad Movie MS/JB 0
Drillbit Taylor PG-13 Comedy JB 3
The Dukes of Hazzard PG-13 Action/Comedy JB 3.25
Earthstorm NR Sci-Fi/Bad Movie JB 2
Elektra PG-13 Action/Comic Book JB 2.5
Elizabethtown PG-13 Comedy/Drama/Romance JB 3.75
Ella Enchanted PG Fantasy MA 3
Enchanted PG-13 Fantasy/Family JB and Steph 3
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind R Drama/Comedy JB 4
Eurotrip R Comedy JB 0.5
Evan Almighty PG Comedy/Fantasy JB 3
The Exorcism of Emily Rose PG-13 Drama/Thriller/Horror JB 3.5
Exorcist: The Beginning R Horror/Thriller JB 3
Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed PG Documentary JB 4
Fahrenheit 9/11 R Documentary MC 3
Failure to Launch PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3.5
Falling Fire R Bad Movie/Sci Fi JB 0.5
The Family Stone PG-13 Drama/Comedy/Romance JB 2.75
Fantastic Four PG-13 Action/Comic JB 2.75
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer PG Action/Comic Book JB 2.5
Fever Pitch PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3.25
Final Destination 3 R Horror/Supernatural Thriller JB 3.5
Firefight R Bad Movie/Action JB 2
Firewall PG-13 Action/Thriller JB 3.25
Flags of Our Fathers R Drama/War/History JB 2.75
Flight of the Living Dead NR Comedic Horror JB 2
Flyboys PG-13 Action/Adventure/War JB 3.5
Fool's Gold PG-13 Action/Romantic Comedy JB 2.5
The Forbidden Kingdom PG-13 Adventure/Fantasy/Comedy JB 3.75
The Forgotten PG-13 Thriller/Sci-Fi JB 4
Four Brothers R Action/Drama JB 4
Fracture R Thriller JB 3.75
Frankenfish R Bad Movie/Horror JB 2
Freedomland R Drama/Mystery JB 2.25
Fun with Dick and Jane PG-13 Comedy JB 4
Garden State R Comedy/Drama MC 4.5
Garfield: The Movie PG Animation/Family JB 2
Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties PG Animation/Family/Comedy JB 2
Gargoyle: Wings of Darkness NR Sci Fi Original/Bad Movie JB 1.5
Ghost Rider PG-13 Action/Comic Book JB 2.75
The Girl Next Door R Romantic Comedy JB 2.5
Glory Road PG Sports Drama JB 3.5
Good Luck Chuck R Raunchy Comedy JB 1
The Greatest Game Ever Played PG Sports Drama JB 3
Gridiron Gang PG-13 Drama/Sports JB 3.75
Grindhouse R Action/Horror/Sci-Fi/Thriller JB 4.25
The Grudge PG-13 Horror/Thriller JB 3.75
The Grudge 2 PG-13 Horror/Thriller JB 2
The Guardian PG-13 Action/Adventure/Drama JB 4
Guess Who PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3.25
Gymkata R Action/Bad Movie JB 1
Hammerhead: Shark Frenzy R Bad Movie JB 1.5
Hannibal Rising R Drama/Thriller JB 2.75
Hard Candy R Drama/Thriller JB 3
Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle R Comedy JB 2
Harpies NR Bad Movie/Sci-Fi JB 0.5
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban PG Adventure/Fantasy JB 3
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire PG-13 Fantasy/Adventure JB 3
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix PG-13 Fantasy/Adventure JB 3
Harsh Times R Action/Crime/Drama JB 3
The Heartbreak Kid R Raunchy Comedy JB 2.5
Hellboy PG-13 Sci-Fi/Comic Book JB 2
Herbie: Fully Loaded PG Family/Comedy JB 2.5
Hero PG-13 Action/Romance MC 4
Hide and Seek R Thriller JB 3
Hide and Creep R Horror/Bad Movie JB 2.5
High Tension R Horror/Slasher JB 2
Highwaymen R Action/Thriller JB 3.5
The Hills Have Eyes R Horror/Thriller JB 3.5
A History of Violence R Drama/Action/Mystery JB 2.5
Hitch PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3.5
The Hitcher R Drama/Horror/Thriller JB 2
The Holiday PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3.5
Hollywoodland R Crime/Drama/Mystery JB 3.75
Hoodwinked (DVD) PG Animation/Family/Comedy JB 3.25
Hostage R Suspense/Thriller JB 4.5
House of Wax R Horror SH 3
I Am Legend PG-13 Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi JB 3
I Know Who Killed Me R Thriller/Bad Movie JB 1
I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry PG-13 Comedy JB 2.5
I, Robot PG-13 Action/Sci-Fi JB 3.5
Ice Age: The Meltdown PG Animation/Family JB 2.75
The Ice Harvest R Drama/Dark Comedy JB 2.5
Ice Princess G Family Dramedy MC 3
In Her Shoes PG-13 Dramedy/Chick Flick JB 3.5
In the Dead of Space R Bad Movie/Sci-Fi JB 0.5
The Incredibles PG Animation/Family JB 4.25
Inside Man R Drama/Thriller/Heist JB 4.5
The Interpreter PG-13 Drama/Thriller JB 3.5
Into the Blue PG-13 Action/Adventure JB 3.75
Into the Wild R Biography/Drama JB 3.75
Intolerable Cruelty PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB/MC 2.5
Iron Man PG-13 Action/Adventure/Superhero JB 4.25
The Island PG-13 Sci-Fi/Action JB 4.25
Jarhead R Action/Comedy/War JB 3
Jersey Girl PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB/SB 3.5
Johnny English PG Comedy JB 1.5
Just Like Heaven PG-13 Romantic Dramedy JB 3
Kicking & Screaming PG Family/Comedy JB 4
Kill Bill 2 R Action/Drama JB 3.5
Killing Streets R Bad Movie JB 1
King Arthur PG-13 Historical Epic JB 3
Kingdom of Heaven R Epic/War JB 2.75
Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang R Murder Mystery/Dark Comedy JB 3.75
Knocked Up R Romantic Dramedy JB 3.5
Komodo Vs. Cobra PG-13 Horror/Bad Movie JB 1
Kung Fu Hustle R Action/Comedy JB 3.75
Ladder 49 PG-13 Action/Drama JB 4
Lady in the Water PG-13 Fantasy/Drama/Mystery JB 4
The Lake House PG Romance/Mystery JB 3.5
Land of the Dead R Horror/Zombie Movie JB 3
Lars and the Real Girl (DVD) PG-13 Comedy/Drama JB 3
The Last Shot R Comedy/Crime MC 3.5
Leatherheads PG-13 Comedy/Romance/Drama JB 2.5
Leeches! PG-13 Bad Movie JB 0
The Legend of Zorro PG Action/Adventure JB 3.25
Lemony Snicket PG Adventure/Fantasy JB 3.5
Letters from Iwo Jima R Historical Drama/War JB 3.5
Little Black Book PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3
Little Miss Sunshine R Comedy/Drama JB 3.25
Live Free or Die Hard PG-13 Action/Adventure JB 3.75
Lonesome Jim R Drama JB 2.5
The Longest Yard PG-13 Comedy JB 3.5
Lord of War R Drama SH 3
A Lot Like Love PG-13 Romantic Dramedy JB 3
Lucky Number Slevin R Crime/Drama/Thriller JB 4
The Machinist R Thriller/Mystery JB 3
Madagascar PG Animation/Family SH 3
Man on Fire R Action/Drama MC/JB 3.5
The Man PG-13 Action/Comedy JB 1
Man of the House PG-13 Action/Comedy JB 3
The Manchurian Candidate (Original) PG-13 Film Noir MC 4
The Manchurian Candidate (Remake) R Thriller MC 3.5
Mansquito NR Bad Movie JB 1.5
Margot at the Wedding R Drama/Comedy/Bad Movie JB 1
Marnie PG Drama/Thriller MC 2.5
Mean Girls PG-13 Comedy JB 3
Meet the Fockers PG-13 Comedy JB 2.5
The Messengers PG-13 Horror/Thriller JB 2.5
Miami Vice R Action/Crime/Drama JB 3.5
Million Dollar Baby PG-13 Drama JB 4.5
Miss Congeniality 2 PG-13 Comedy JB 3
The Mist R Horror JB 2.5
Monster-in-Law PG-13 Romantic Comedy SH 3
Mr. and Mrs. Smith PG-13 Action/Adventure/Comedy JB 3.5
Munich R Drama/History JB 2.5
Music and Lyrics PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3.25
My Super Ex-Girlfriend PG-13 Comedy/Fantasy Guylian 2.5
Nacho Libre PG Comedy JB 2.75
Napoleon Dynamite PG Comedy MS 3
National Treasure PG Action/Adventure JB 3.5
The Nativity Story PG Drama Nikki 4.5
Nemesis Game R Thriller JB 3.5
Night at the Museum PG Comedy/Fantasy/Family JB 2.5
The Night Listener R Drama/Mystery SH 2.75
No Country for Old Men R Crime/Drama/Thriller JB 4.5
The Notebook PG-13 Romantic Drama JB 3.5
The Number 23 R Drama/Mystery/Thriller JB 3.5
Ocean's 11 PG-13 Thriller/Heist JB 3.5
Ocean's 12 PG-13 Thriller/Heist JB 4
Once R Drama/Music JB 4
Over the Hedge PG Animation/Family/Comedy JB 3.5
P.S. I Love You PG-13 Romantic Dramedy JB and Steph 2
Pan's Labyrinth R Drama/Fantasy JB 3.5
The Passion of the Christ R Drama JB 4.5
Paycheck PG-13 Action/Sci-Fi MS 3
The Phantom of the Opera PG-13 Musical MC and MA 4.25/4.75
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest PG-13 Action/Adventure/Comedy MC 4.25
The Polar Express G Animation/Family JB 3.5
Poseidon PG-13 Action/Adventure/Drama SH 3.75
The Prestige PG-13 Drama/Fantasy/Sci-Fi/Thriller JB 4.25
The Prince and Me PG Romantic Comedy JB 1
Princess Diaries 2 G Romantic Comedy MA 3.5
Psycho R Horror/Thriller MC 5
Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys NR Bad Movie JB 0.5
The Pursuit of Happyness PG-13 Drama JB 3.25
Racing Stripes PG Family/Gay Movie JB 1.5
Raising Helen PG-13 Romantic Dramady/Chick Flick JB 2.5
Ratatouille PG Animation/Family JB 3
The Reaping R Horror/Thriller JB 2.5
Rebecca NR Mystery/Romance MC 5
Red-Eye PG-13 Psychological Thriller JB 3.75
Rescue Dawn PG-13 War/Drama JB 3.75
Resident Evil: Apocalypse R Horror/Adventure JB 3.75
Ring 2 PG-13 Horror/Thriller JB 2.5
The Ringer PG-13 Comedy JB 3
Robots PG Animation/Family JB 2.5
Rocky Balboa PG Sports Drama JB 3.25
Rope PG Thriller/Crime MC 3.5
Route 666 R Horror/Bad Movie JB 1
The Ruins R Horror/Thriller JB 2.5
Rumor Has It PG-13 Romantic Dramedy JB 2.75
Sahara PG-13 Action/Adventure/Comedy JB 2.75
Saw R Thriller/Horror JB 4
Saw II R Horror/Thriller JB 3.75
Scary Movie 4 PG-13 Comedy/Parody JB 2.5
School of Rock PG-13 Comedy JB 4
School for Scoundrels PG-13 Comedy JB 3.25
Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed PG Comedy/Family JB 2.5
Secret Window PG-13 Thriller/Horror JB 3
See No Evil R Horror/Slasher JB 2
Seed of Chucky R Horror/Comedy JB 2
Semi-Pro R Comedy JB 2.75
Shark Tale PG Animation/Comedy JB 2
Shaun of the Dead R Comedy/Horror JB 2.5
Shoot 'Em Up R Action/Comedy JB 2.5
Shooter R Action/Drama/Thriller JB 3.5
Shrek 2 PG Animation/Family MC 4.5
Silent Hill R Horror/Thriller JB 4
Sin City R Crime/Comic Book JB 4
Skeleton Key PG-13 Horror/Thriller/Mystery JB 3.75
Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow PG Sci-Fi/Adventure MS/MA 3.25 / 3.75
Slither R Comedy/Horror JB 3
Smokin' Aces R Action/Comedy JB 2
The Snake King NR Creature Feature/Bad Movie JB 1.5
Snakehead Terror NR Bad Movie/Horror JB 1.5
Snakes on a Plane R Action/Thriller/Bad Movie JB 2.75
Solar Force R Bad Movie JB 0.5
Something New PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3
Son of the Mask PG Comedy/Family JB 2.5
Soul Plane R Comedy MS 2
A Sound of Thunder PG-13 Action/Sci-Fi JB 2
Spanglish PG-13 Romantic Dramedy JB 3.5
Spartan R Thriller MS 3.5
Spider-Man 2 PG-13 Action/Comic Book MC/JB 4
SpongeBob SquarePants PG Animation/Family JB 3
Starsky & Hutch PG-13 Comedy JB/MC 4
Star Wars 3: Revenge of the Sith PG-13 Sci-Fi/Action JB 5
Stealth PG-13 Action/Adventure JB 3
The Stepford Wives PG-13 Comedy/Drama JB 0.5
Stranger than Fiction PG-13 Comedy/Drama/Fantasy/Romance JB 4
Street Kings R Crime/Drama/Thriller JB 2.5
Strip Search R Bad Movie MS/JB 0.5
Sunshine R Sci-Fi/Thriller JB 3
Superman Returns PG-13 Action/Comic JB 3.75
Suspect Zero R Thriller JB 3
Syriana R Boring Drama JB 1
Taking Lives R Thriller JB 3
Take the Lead PG-13 Drama/Music JB 3
Team America R Comedy/Satire JB 2.5
Tenacious D: The Pick of Destiny R Comedy/Musical JB 2
Thank You for Smoking R Comedy/Drama/Satire JB/MC 4
The Gingerdead Man R Bad Movie JB 1
There Will Be Blood R Drama JB 3
Timeline PG-13 Adventure/Sci-Fi/Bad Movie JB 1.5
TMNT PG Animated/Comic Book/Action JB 3.25
The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift PG-13 Action Jen Lee 3.75
Torque PG-13 Action JB 2
Transformers PG-13 Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi JB 4
The Transporter 2 PG-13 Action JB 3.25
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants PG Drama/Teen SH 2.75
Tristan & Isolde PG-13 Drama/Romance/Epic JB 3.25
Troy R Epic Drama SH 3.5
Trust the Man R Romantic Dramedy JB 2.5
Turistas R Horror JB 2.5
Twisted R Thriller MC/JB 2
Two for the Money R Sports Dramedy JB 3.5
Underworld: Evolution R Action/Horror JB 4
The Upside of Anger R Romantic Dramedy JB 3.25
V for Vendetta R Comic Book/Drama JB 2.75
Vacancy R Horror/Thriller JB 3.75
Van Helsing PG-13 Action/Adventure/Fantasy JB 3
Vanity Fair PG-13 Drama MA 4
Vantage Point PG-13 Action/Drama/Thriller JB 3.25
The Village PG-13 Thriller/Drama JB/MC 3
Waiting R Comedy JB 2.5
Waitress PG-13 Romantic Comedy JB 3
Walking Tall PG-13 Action/Adventure JB 3.5
Walk the Line PG-13 Biography/Drama JB 3.75
Wallace & Gromit G Animation/Family/Comedy JB 3.5
War of the Worlds PG-13 Sci-Fi/Action SH 4
We Are Marshall PG Sports Drama JB 3.5
We Own the Night R Crime Drima JB 3.5
The Weather Man R