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Movie Review - War of the Worlds (2005)
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(What this rating means)
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| Director: |
Steven Spielberg |
| Starring: |
Tom Cruise, Dakota Fanning, Justin Chatwin, and Tim Robbins |
| Rated: |
PG-13 (Science-fiction violence) |
| Length: |
116 minutes |
| Genre: |
Sci-Fi/Action/Drama |
| Tagline: |
They're already here. |
| Studio: |
Paramount Pictures |
| Website: |
War of the Worlds |
| Release: |
June 29, 2005 |
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PLOT
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Pint-sized blue collar worker and deadbeat dad Ray Ferrier (Cruise) takes care of his two kids Justin (Chatwin)
and Rachel (Fanning) in New Jersey while his ex-wife and her new husband visit her parents in Boston. Soon,
reports of strange lightning storms fill the airwaves, and a huge dark cloud moves right over Jersey, lightning
striking away. Giant tripod alien creatures/machines emerge from the ground, zapping people into ash. Ray gets the
kids and attempts to take them back to their mother. Mucho alien destruction ensues.
NOTE: Due to his softball game being on the same night, Johnny
was unable to attend the War of the Worlds screening. However, Stephanie and Mr. Shade attended, and
Stephanie has agreed to do the review. Johnny would like everyone to know that he is not bitter about having
to miss the screening and he hopes any comments he makes will reflect that.
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STEPH'S TAKE
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You are forced to line up and relinquish most of the possessions you are carrying. You are not allowed to communicate
with any one in the outside world. You are marked with a purple bracelet and subjected to a body search. Have the
aliens taken over? Is this a Scientology initiation? No, you are just trying to see a sneak preview of War of
the Worlds. Thankfully, the guy with the rubber glove was surprisingly gentle.
I've never been swoony for Tom Cruise, and his in-your-face personal opinions threaten to taint my views of his
movies. However, I still managed to really enjoy War of the Worlds. I wasn't blown away by Cruise's
performance, but I was thoroughly entertained by all the havoc wreaked by the alien tripods. Plus, I always like
Dakota Fanning.
Johnny: Sure you do. Eating at the Spielberg family table these
days, are ya? SHILL! STUDIO PLANT! Sorry, I'm not bitter. Just preparing you for what it's like to deal with
detractors.
So often when massive destruction is portrayed with people and debris and cars flying, something is just a little
off. I think it's usually the speed that makes you think, "Hmm, that is obviously a special effect." However, in
this movie, it all seemed real. The roads cracking, buildings splitting -- it was cool. The mob scenes gave me
flashbacks to the awful experience Johnny, Mr. Shade, and I had at the Beale Street music festival. There was lots
of action throughout the film to hold my attention.
Johnny: That's nice. Too bad none of that action was as good as
the sweet, sweet softball action that was going down when we came from behind to win while y'all were enjoying the
little movie. The victory was almost sweet enough to prevent me from being bitter over missing the
movie. Which I'm not.
The aliens themselves were cool enough. However, Mr. Shade and I agreed that despite how obviously advanced and
powerful they were, you'd think they would have a better method of searching through a basement than having one
mechanically-eyed tentacle slowly creep around corners and manage to always just miss the noisy humans as they
kept hiding. "We'll destroy about everything outside, but even though there is obviously something in this place
kicking up a racket, we'll just wait for absolute visual confirmation."
Johnny: I have a "mechanically-eyed testicle" Tom Cruise joke that
I am just gonna completely leave alone here. Actually, I don't have any clue what that means.
This isn't a movie full of plot. It's pretty much, "WE NEED TO GET AWAY FROM THE ALIENS WHILE THE ARMY TRIES TO
FIGHT THEM UNSUCCESSFULLY!" Oh, and yeah, Ray really does love his kids, yippee. But this is about aliens kicking
some Earth booty for awhile. And while that concept might not necessarily be something by which we should be
entertained, I still had a lot of fun watching it. I did have issues with the ending -- not concerning the aliens,
but with Ray and his family. That part was almost a little more unbelievable than the aliens. I never read the
book, so I don't know who to blame.
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ODDS & ENDS
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- Shot in 72 days.
- Opening and closing narration is performed by Morgan Freeman. I wonder how much cash he got.
- They say that the longer couples are together, the more they look alike. I think this is true because Tim
Robbins' boobs were looking mighty large in this movie.
- There are over 500 CGI effects in the film.
- Residents lined up for autographs in Howell, NJ during filming. Tom Cruise said he'd quit if anyone pushed,
shoved, or did anything rude. One woman did some pushing, and Cruise stopped like he said he would. I'd just like
to say I'm not sorry for my actions.
- Johnny thinks Tom was just jealous when he realized Stephanie was 5 feet tall.
- Johnny would've yelled out, "Scientology sucks!" or "Katie's a ho!" just to see what Cruise would
do.
- An exchange between Mr. Shade and me before the movie as I spied a cardboard box on the floor that was
approximately 3x2x1:
Steph: I wonder what's in that box?
Mr. Shade: It might be Tom Cruise.
- Turns out it WAS Tom Cruise. He was playing hide and seek.
- Tim Robbins was in Anchorman with Ben Stiller who was in Flirting with Disaster with Josh Brolin
who was in Hollow Man with Kevin Bacon.
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MAMA'S APPROVAL
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I don't know how keen mama is with aliens blasting humans all day, but it's not a gore-fest with blood spraying
everywhere. There is some language to deal with, including GD's.
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TRAILER COMPARISON
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The trailer is a good representation of what you'll get in the movie: Lots of chaos and all sorts of stuff getting
all blowed up by aliens. Load up on popcorn if you have enough money. If you are a Scientologist, you might not
have any money left though.
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THE GIST
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War of the Worlds is all about the special effects, and for folks who dig that, this is a very entertaining
action movie that will keep you enthralled. As an added bonus, Tom Cruise doesn't talk about Katie Holmes in it.
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