"Johnny Betts is a rude 'abnoxious' jerk who needs to be 'punced' in the face."- A grammatically-challenged non-fan  

WWWP - Is the Audible Yawning Necessary?

Johnny Betts So I'm resting comfortably in my plush theater seat, waiting for the movie to start, when I hear a super loud, super annoying yawn from the person sitting directly behind me. "Fine, it's still five minutes before showtime, so he's probably just getting it out of his system," I think to myself.

Unfortunately, he had about 12 more that he had to get out of his system ... DURING THE COURSE OF THE MOVIE! And he always seemed to wait until the quietest parts. The movie would be rolling along smoothly, and then we'd hit a quiet spot with no dialogue or action, and then Mr. Rudey McInconsiderate would throw down a loud, long, drawn-out yawn. The kind that if you do it in front of your friends they might sarcastically ask, "Is that your impression of a locomotive or something?" A couple were so guttural that they could be mistaken as something demonic.

Oooh, and he even went so far as to add the stupid lip-smacking sound at the end of one or two of the yawns. Nails on a chalkboard.

I'm usually able to ignore stuff like that, but after about the seventh one I couldn't help but be distracted. I came very close to giving him the ol' over-the-shoulder-glare. I probably should have.

Hey dude, do you yawn so audibly everywhere you go? Would you do that at a wedding? In church? How about at a funeral? I highly doubt it. So why do it at the movies?

Folks, it's real simple. Yawns can be suppressed. There is absolutely no reason why you can't make them inaudible. If you yawn loudly during a movie then no one, and I mean absolutely no one, will think you're cute or funny. They'll think you're a rude "abnoxious" jerk who needs to be "punced" in the face, and I refuse to let anybody take that label away from me!

WHAT'S WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!?!?!

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