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WWWP - Ring Tones

Johnny Betts Ring tones. Everybody loves 'em. Do you have a favorite tune or TV theme song? Then chances are it's served as your ring tone at one time or another. Yes, everybody in your vicinity wants to punch you straight in the face due to the fact that they're forced to listen to Avril Lavigne's Girlfriend every time you receive a call from your sweetie, but hey, don't worry about it; as long as you think it's absolutely adorable.

Don't get me wrong; I don't have a problem with personalized ring tones. Y'all did know that on most phones you can set a specific tone for a specific phone number, right? Good. I've had fun suggesting to friends what mine should be for their phone. It's amazing how quickly Baby Got Back can wear thin after a few calls. Apparently, a business lunch isn't the ideal place for the cell phone to burst out in a chorus of "I like big butts and I cannot lie" while a friend desperately fumbles through her purse, angry she ever took my (at the time) hilarious suggestion.

When I get a chance, I plan on personalizing my tone with either The Young Riders theme song or perhaps one of my favorite Josh Brolin movie quotes. It'll be fun times indeed. But it's important to point out that a little common courtesy should be exercised out of respect for anybody within ear shot of your cellular stamp of individuality. Let's take a moment to examine a little cell phone etiquette, shall we?

  • Don't use a ring tone that will go off every time you receive an email. If you have a Blackberry on which you receive email, then please put that sucker on silent or vibrate. Nobody, I repeat, no-freakin'-body thinks it's cute to hear "Git 'errrrrrrrrrrrr duuuuuuuuuuun" 50 times a day because you think it's hilarious and so poignant. The fact that you take the time to explain to people it's a funny way to let you know it's a work email and thus works needs to be done, well, that ain't taking you off any hit lists, let me tell ya.

    This brings me to the next point...


  • Do not, under any circumstances, use a Larry the Cable Guy ring tone. The aforementioned "Git 'errrrrrrrrrrrr duuuuuuuuuuun," is bad enough, but do you really think anybody is going to hear "This is Larry the Cable Guy tellin' yeeeeew that yeeeeew bettuuuur answuuuuuuur that phone!" and then attempt to ask you where to get the tone, only to fail because they can't spit out the words amidst their maniacal laughter? It ain't happenin' so ditch the tone.


  • Don't leave the phone at your desk. Nothing will incite a person to commit death and dismemberment faster than being forced to listen to the never-ending ring tone of a cell phone left at somebody's desk. If I happen upon Toby Keith's I Wanna Talk about Me on the radio then I change the station faster than Stephen Baldwin can sign on to do a Sci-Fi Original. So what makes you think I want to hear the chorus over and over when your wife calls you at the exact moment you stepped away for lunch? There might not be a channel to change in this circumstance, but there's a ceiling tile with your phone's name on it. Don't think I won't do it.
It's not that hard to avoid driving those around you to the insane asylum. Simply exercise a few manners, and put other people's feelings before yours for once, and maybe you won't be the guy everybody is going home and complaining about.

Excuse me, sir, but Who Let the Dogs Out? Seriously? Let me guess - you have that set for when the year 2000 calls.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!?!?!
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