The commercials end just in time to show Kid ride in and find Lou. Oh, Lou’s still alive.  Whoops.  Kid tends to Lou and in the process must remove his shirt… LOU IS A GIRL!!!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!!!!!! I TOTALLY THOUGHT IT WAS A GUY!!!!!!!!  Who is writing these scripts, M. Night Shyamalan?!?!  What a twist.

Please.  Is there anybody who couldn’t tell Lou was a girl from the moment they saw her? That fake deep voice wasn’t fooling anybody.  Though I have to admit there are moments where Lou looks like a Chinese boy.  We’ll get to that later.

Anywho, Lou  explains she ran away from an orphanage. Kid ponders about what would’ve happened if Scarface and his men had discovered that she was a girl. Lou apparently isn’t interested in staying in the Pony Express for very long. Her long-term goal is to get her brother and sister out of the orphanage.  In other words, there will soon be an episode featuring Lou’s siblings and then we’ll never see them again.

The scene ends with Kid NOT promising to keep Lou’s secret.

Buck studies some hoof tracks and determines there are 12 or 13 men in Scarface’s group, plus two wagons.  And a mariachi player.  OK. Why did everybody else seem to have trouble figuring out how many bad guys there were? Couldn’t they have studied the hoof tracks? Why is Buck the only one smart enough to count the number of hoof tracks? Oh yeah, he’s an Indian. Cody points out nobody has ever lost a pouch before, and Lou (with the return of the fake deep voice) claims she’s not gonna be the first.

Ike taps his chest 3 times, circles his hand around, and sports a concerned face.  Buck says it means Ike wants to know how they’ll go up against all those men. I’m afraid Buck’s wrong on this one. I looked it up in the Rider Review Sign Language Dictionary and it turns out Ike was saying he had heartburn and needed to go to the bathroom, but there was no toilet paper. I wonder if the writers did that intentionally?

Interestingly, Ike tweeted about it.  Check it out:

Let me go ahead and write the email for you:

1) Idiot.  Ike couldn’t talk, but he COULD write.  Therefore, he could send a Tweet since it’s non-verbal.  You’re a moron.

2) Ingenious.  Obviously, you understand that Ike could write, but you ignored that and managed to encapsulate a sense of irony within your tweet joke.  It’s a level of wit that will likely fly over the heads of non-Jimmy fans.

Copy and paste the one that applies to you.

Kid tries to be the leader and announces he has a plan. He puts his arm around Ike and says, “Here’s what you need to do.” Then he moves away from Ike about 2 seconds later. HE DID NOT HAVE TIME TO TELL IKE EXACTLY WHAT HE NEEDED TO DO! Oh, wait, I just consulted my Rider Review Sign Language Dictionary and apparently putting your arm around someone’s shoulder is sign language for, “You need to ride back to the station and bring us the Beckwith volley guns.” I apologize for my rash assumption.

The riders head to Scarface’s camp, giving us the chance to hear the theme music yet again. No complaints here; it’s only the coolest TV theme song of all time.  I have two versions of the song on my mp3 player.

The riders arrive at Scarface’s camp. Buck is concerned because of all the guns the outlaws have. Jimmy calmly says, “Let’s rush ‘em.” Have I said that Jimmy rules? Buck doesn’t like Jimmy’s idea and thinks Jimmy is crazier than any of them had previously thought. Cody points out that Scarface and his merry gang of generics have buffalo guns and fresh horses while the riders have little firepower and no cover. Hickok accuses Cody of being scared. Cody makes a good point by telling Jimmy they’re no longer dealing with cans on a fence. Jimmy tells him he can ride out. They scuffle. WHAT ABOUT THE OATH?!?!?! Watch the face Cody makes as they wrestle; it’s hilarious.

Lou continues this charade of Kid being the leader as she asks him what they should do next. In another “mark-out remark” candidate, Jimmy says, “Let me know when you’re all through talkin’.” The man is all business, folks. So for some unknown reason Kid stands up. Scarface notices him. Scarface doesn’t seem to be intimidated by these “boys,” and he lets the riders know he’s gonna finish his coffee and then he’s gonna kill all of them.

Luckily, Ike shows up just in time with the Beckwiths. Kid tells him he “done good.” Ike smiles. Buck didn’t tell us what Ike’s smile was saying, but you readers are in luck. With the Rider Review Sign Language Dictionary by my side I can let everyone know what Ike was trying to say. Let’s see… “Thanks Kid. Your acceptance means more to me than anything else in the world. After all, you’re our fearless leader. Your sign of appreciation means more to me than hair or the ability to talk ever could.” Ike always was a bit verbose.

So everybody gets their Beckwiths ready. Jimmy stands up, ready to shoot. Kid warns Jimmy to brace himself. Jimmy fires the rifle and in a very funny moment we see the kick throw him backwards to the ground.

The riders really tear up the camp, forcing the bad guys to give up. In another funny line Cody says, “Well, I guess he finished his coffee.” Hmm, not technically. All the riders were still alive, and Scarface had explicitly said he’d kill the riders AFTER he finished his coffee. Therefore, we can conclude Scarface did NOT finish his coffee since all the riders were still alive. I’m sure the writers are trying to say Cody represents some sort of stereotype, but I haven’t figured it out yet. I’ll keep you updated.

The riders round up the outlaws and Jimmy is ready to hang ‘em high. Kid stops him and says there won’t be any hangings; he wants to let “the law” deal with them. Sigh.

OK, time to introduce all of you readers to a new term. It’s called “marking out.” If I say that I “marked out” for something, then it means I thought it was awesome.  So if I say, “I’m a Jimmy mark,” then I’m saying that I’m a fan of Jimmy. Keep that in mind for my next paragraph.

Jimmy tells Kid, “Out here we’re the law. A man like that you never leave him standing, never.” Kid whines and Jimmy says, in another “mark-out remark” contender, “You ain’t running things, Kid.” I MARKED OUT big time on that one. I never fail to clap during that scene. JIMMY RULES!!!!

So Kid whines some more and gets his way, but Jimmy points out it’s a mistake. Scarface warns Kid he hasn’t seen the last of him.  Who wants to bet Scarface breaks out of jail and has one last standoff with Kid prior to the closing credits?

Commercial.

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